Transformation

 In my neighborhood, there is a medium-size house built in the Victorian style, complete with turret.  The house was painted a dull grey, and the yard was overgrown for years behind a small white fence that did more to shut out than to welcome visitors.  Everything about the house said "Neglect," and it was even rumored that the house was haunted.  

Recently, a young couple purchased the house and began renovations, despite having heard the rumors of ghosts.  They repainted the exterior a softer shade of grey, removed the overgrown debris in the yard, and began installing a garden that included benches and fountains, making the home once again inviting and welcoming.  Although I have not seen the inside of the home, I can imagine that every corner and closet has been gone through with improvements.

I was thinking about that house this morning as I read the meditation from Richard Rohr:

Contemplative prayer allows us to build our own house. To pray is to discover that Someone else is within our house and to recognize that it is not our house at all. To keeping praying is to have no house to protect because there is only One House. And that One House is Everybody’s Home. In other words, those who pray from the heart actually live in a very different world. I like to say it’s a Christ-soaked world, a world where matter is inspirited and spirit is embodied. In this world, everything is sacred; and the word “Real” takes on a new meaning. 

It appears that God loves life—the creating never stops.

We will love and create and maintain life.

It appears that God is love—an enduring, patient kind.

We will seek and trust love in all its humanizing (and therefore divinizing forms.

It appears that God loves the variety of multiple features, faces, and forms.

We will not be afraid of the other, the not-me, the stranger at the gate.

It appears that God loves—is—beauty: Look at this world!

Those who pray already know this. Their passion will be for beauty.

***********************************************************

Once we allow Jesus to enter our house and to begin His renovation, He will eventually open all the doors and closets, move around or discard the furniture, and clean up the exterior so that people are no longer afraid to enter, and the ghosts will be dispersed.  We will discover that our house is a house for others, because it is no longer "our" house, but now God's house --- and He will welcome those He chooses.  His passion is for beauty and for life, whereas we may have become accustomed to dinginess and decay.  

Revelation 3:20 says, "Behold, I stand at the door and knock.  If anyone will open to Me, I will come in and sup with him, and he with Me."  If we invite Him in, and give Him room to move in us, we may be surprised at the renovations that begin to happen!

 

Unwrapping All My Presents

 Sitting by the window early Christmas morning, I watched the bright morning star, Venus, glowing through tree limbs against a dark sky just about to be lightened by the rising sun. I couldn't help smiling as I thought that I could have spent hundreds of dollars going to a resort somewhere to see the same peaceful sight.

All the promises of Christmas were mine at that moment: love, joy, peace, contentment.  There was nothing I lacked.  If God is truly 'with us," as the name Emmanuel suggests, this is what it feels like.  No need for expensive presents -- what do I want with diamonds, or iphones, or billiard tables?  All substitutes for the peace that only God can give us!

The promise of Christmas is that God is with us.  All we have to do is to unwrap the Gift!

Pain and Fear and Doubt

 So here is Elizabeth, in her old age and in her sixth month.  Zachery, her husband, is unable to speak after his encounter with the Angel Gabriel six months previously.  And she....who does she have to speak with about her pain...and her fear....and her doubt.  The Jews were literate, so maybe Zach had somehow communicated with her in writing what had happened to him, but still...so many unanswered questions had to be swirling through her mind.  This child of hers.....who was he to be?  And now, the long-awaited Messiah was about to appear?  What would it mean for the Jews?

And now, she hears a voice calling to her, and the child in her womb leaps for joy!  Mary, her cousin, has arrived from Nazareth:  "How is it that the mother of my Lord should come to me?" Elizabeth cries!  And Mary herself, with her own questions.  How to say what has happened to her?  But Elizabeth already understands by the grace of God and power of the Holy Spirit.  No unbelievable explanations needed here.  For the next three months, the women have joy and companionship in their questions, fears, and doubts.  What is to happen next?  How will Mary explain to Joseph? Imagine the Messiah of Israel from Mary, her cousin!  Who is to help me in childbirth? 

And here is the beauty of "God-with-us"!  Whenever there is a manifestation, an incarnation, of God in our lives, He at that moment sends someone to help us, to understand what has happened to us.  He sends companionship along the way.  No lengthy explanations necessary!  We meet at once a "soul friend," a companion.  In the words of one of the songs from the charismatic renewal, You send marvelous comrades to me, the people who dwell in your land/ those who have chosen alien gods/ have chosen an alien band.

Our God is Emmanuel -- God with us. Not only does He pour out his presence in us (called "grace"), but He sends us companions to walk with us, to explore with us our questions, doubts, and fears:  What has happened to me?  How am I to respond?  What should I do next?  Who will guide me?  And who will share my joy?

Mary and Elizabeth -- cousins and companions.  A great lesson for us!

The Tears of Jesus

In Jerusalem, there is a small church on the Mount of Olives called "Dominus Flevit": The Tears of the Lord. From the site of the church, one has a beautiful view of the city the Jerusalem laid out down below. The Gospel reports that from this site, Jesus looked down on the city and wept: Jerusalem, Jerusalem, how often I would have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing!  (Matt. 23).

Just 40 years later, Jerusalem would be wiped off the map for centuries by the invasion of Rome; the temple would be destroyed even until now, and the Jews would be scattered over the face of the earth.  When I visited the site of Dominus Flevit, I began to weep myself, knowing the fate of the beautiful city I saw below.  But looking back on that moment, I now think that the reason for my tears was that the Spirit of Jesus lives within me, making me love what He loves and grieve over the things that grieved Him on earth.

Matthew 12:30 gives us another saying of Jesus:  Whoever is not with me is against me, and whoever does not gather with me scatters.  In the past few years, I have felt within me the urge to "gather" those I love "as a hen gathers her brood under her wings."  When I sit down to pray in the morning, or sometimes at Mass, I feel myself "gathering" together those I love under my wings.  This inclination is vastly different from that initial inclination when I first experienced the power of the Holy Spirit in my life.

At one of the prayer meetings in those earlier days, I "saw" in my spirit a ladder leading from earth into heaven, and at that time, I wanted to begin climbing the ladder, leaving everything on earth behind.  At my first steps, however, the Lord stopped me with His will:  I want you to go to the back of the church (symbolically), where are those who feel unworthy to come to Me; I want you to put your arms around them and walk with them until they also want to come to Me as you do.  The vision lasted only a second, but I understood that my task was not "to get to heaven," but to bring with me so many others.

Today, some 40+ years later, my heart and  arms metaphorically go around a multitude of other people.  I know that on my journey to the next life, I am "attached" to so many people.  I can't run up that ladder alone; I bring with me so many other people who have become part of me.  At the last supper, Jesus said to His disciples, I go to prepare a place for you...and I will take you to myself; that where I am, there you also may be.  And where I go you know, and the way also you know (John 14).

The whole Catholic doctrine of the communion of saints rests on this principle:  that, like Jesus, we enter eternal life (even in this life) not alone, but with others whom we have come to love.  God is the Great Gathering Force.  "Where there is division, there is sin," according to St. Athanasius.  Jesus returned to heaven with a 'great cloud of witnesses" (Heb, 12), taking with Him "a crowd of captives and gave gifts to his people" (Eph. 4). 

Today when I pray, I stand with so many people that I cannot leave alone, and everyday the circle widens and grows, the result of the Spirit of God dwelling in me (Romans 5:  The love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit which has been given to us.)  I used to wonder whether that meant that now "we love God" or that it meant that "God's love for us" has been poured out.  Today I know it means both:  The Spirit enables us to both love God and to love others whom He loves.  

So here's my promise and guarantee:  if I know you, I love you, and you will be with me where I am in the next life!  Not by any grace or gift of my own, but by the grace and gift of Jesus Christ, who first wept over Jerusalem and over all of us!

The Spirit of Practical Wisdom

 Then the Lord said to Moses, "See, I have chosen Bezalel, son of Uri, the son of Hur, of the tribe of Judah, and I have filled him with the Spirit of God, with skill, ability, and knowledge in all kinds of crafts --- to make artistic designs for work in gold, silver and bronze, to cut and set stones, to work in wood, and to engage in all kinds of craftsmanship....Also, I have given skill to all the craftsmen to make everything I have commanded you (Exodus 31:1-6).

An alternate translation of the phrase "Spirit of God" above is "the Spirit of Practical Wisdom."  I love that translation because it conveys so well the meaning of wisdom itself.  If we read the Book of Proverbs, as well as the Books of Wisdom and Sirach (found only in Catholic bibles), we find out just how "practical" Wisdom is.

We tend to think of Wisdom as some abstract virtue that has little to do with everyday living.  The opening lines of Sirach reinforce the idea of the guru on the mountain, inspired, but not really in touch with reality as we experience it:

All wisdom comes from the Lord, and with him it remains forever.
The sand on the seashore, the drops of rain, the days of eternity: who can number these?

Heaven's height, earth's breadth, the depths of the abyss: who can explore these?

Before all things else wisdom was created; and prudent understanding from eternity.

To whom has wisdom's root been revealed? Who knows her subtleties?

There is but one, wise and truly awe-inspiring, seated upon his throne:

It is the Lord; he created her, has seen her and taken note of her.  

He has poured her forth upon all his works, upon every living thing according to his bounty; 

He has lavished her upon his friends.

If we continue reading in Sirach, however, we soon discover just how practical Wisdom can be to everyday life: 

 "One cannot justify unjust anger; anger plunges a man to his downfall.  A patient man need stand firm but for a time, and then contentment comes back to him."

"Let your acquaintances be many, but one in a thousand your confidant.  When you gain a friend, first test him, and be not too ready to trust him.  For one sort of friend is a friend when it suits him, but he will not be with you in time of distress.  Another is a friend who becomes an enemy, and tells of the quarrel to your shame...."

Readings throughout Exodus, where the tabernacle is being constructed in the wilderness, and in the first Book of Kings, where the first temple is being built, tell us just how practical wisdom is, where the Lord bestows knowledge and skill on those who are doing the actual building and furnishing.  

From the time I was in the 8th grade, I fell in love with the idea of wisdom.  (Or maybe it was just that I fell in love with the word "sapientia," the Latin for "wisdom," as I was given an art project to work on that included the Latin term.)  Whatever the case, I began at that time to crave wisdom and I developed the habit of seeking and praying for wisdom. To this day, I seek wisdom as I work in the garden and try to figure out how to solve simple problems such as how to haul 40 lbs. of soil too heavy for me to lift into the wheelbarrow....  Or when I must take medicine whose side-effects counteract those of other medicines I need.... Or when I am at a loss as to how to bring order to a chaotic office space that houses multiple projects.

And wisdom comes through channels I least expect, at times I least expect it to come.  But that's a story for another time.  For today, a simple prayer that stays on my desk:

Holy Spirit, I don't know what my future looks like.

All I ask is that you fill me with your grace and guide my decisions today.

Come, Holy Spirit, and let me know you are with me; help me to detect your voice.

I open my heart to you; please come and guide me.

Knowing God

 Holy Father, ...the world does not know you (Jn. 17:25).

"The world does not know you."  The impassioned plea of Jesus in John 17 was that the "world" would come to know the Father.  Just a few chapters previously, He had promised to send the Spirit, Who would teach us all truth, the Spirit, the Advocate, who would dwell with us and make Jesus known to us.  

And then Jesus will continue to make known the Father to us:  I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them (17:26).

What Jesus is talking about here is experience of the Father.  "To know" in Hebrew mentality is to "experience."  We are not talking about head knowledge; we are referring rather to 'heart" knowledge -- a kind of knowing that cannot be shaken.  The famous line is "A man with an experience is not swayed by a man with an argument."  What Jesus wants the disciples to have is experience of His Father, the same kind of experience that He Himself has while on earth.

So then the question arises:  How can we have such an experience?  How can we "know" God the way Jesus knew the Father?  During Jesus lifetime, He practiced open table fellowship with the "world" that did not know the Father -- the tax collectors, the prostitutes, the ordinary fishermen who were looked down upon by the religious scholars and scribes.  "I came to call sinners, not the righteous," He proclaimed.  The Father Himself was seeking the lost sheep, those who did not know Him.  

Today, Jesus still seeks those who do not know the Father.  "Behold, I stand at the door and knock," He says in Revelation 3:20.  "If anyone will open to me, I will come in and eat with him and he with Me."   Open table fellowship.  He was not ashamed to eat at Zacchaeus' house; he is at home in ours.  He "will come in," wherever, however, we live.  And He is not ashamed to invite us to His house, where He enjoys fellowship with the Father.  All He wants is to share with us His own experience of the Father.  It's really that simple.  

And for our part....it's as simple as opening the door.

Commiserate Prayer

 I groaned with visceral pain as I listened to a friend describe what his sister has been going through for the last two years with cancer.  After suffering three bouts of chemo treatment, none of them has worked for her, and now she has to decide whether to attempt a fourth round.

Another friend recently described a lung condition that constantly threatens her life -- not gradually, but all at once, shutting down all the valves so that no breathing is possible.  The average span of life after this diagnosis is three years, and every day, she is conscious of that.  

When I attempt to pray for people like this, my mind often shuts down even while my spirit groans in pain.  I don't know how to pray for them.  Healing, yes; Comfort, yes; Experience of God's closeness, yes; help from family and friends, yes.  But still....nothing I can do or pray seems adequate in the face of their suffering.  

Today I read Psalm 20.  I often use the psalms for prayer, as they express what I cannot say.  And reading this psalm with particular people in mind has made it even more relevant:

May the Lord answer you in time of trial;
may the name of Jacob's God protect you,
sending you help from the holy place,
and giving you support from Zion.

May God remember all your offerings,

receive your sacrifices with favor,

give you your heart's desire,

and fulfill every one of your plans.

May we ring out our joy at your victory,

and raise banners in the name of our God.

May the Lord grant all your prayers.

Perhaps this psalm is not really any more "effective," if you will, than my silent groaning, but at least I now feel that I am praying with those who are suffering rather than for them.  I am asking that their prayers be answered, rather than mine.  And somehow, I think that might count for something.

Encouragement

Many are the troubles of the just man, 
but out of them all the Lord delivers him (Ps. 34:20). 

Almost everyone I know right now is going through "troubles," whether from the aftermath of the storm or from concern over health problems, or worry about family problems.  For some, it never seems to let up, and discouragement sets in, and then depression, robbing one of energy and the joy of life.  

It saddens me that so few people will turn to the Psalms for encouragement.  I completely understand why people will not read other sections of Scripture when they are feeling discouraged, because, unless the Holy Spirit is leading you to the exact passage you need at the moment, it takes some energy to do "Scripture study."   But the Psalms were made for times like this.  

Although not all of the Psalms were written by David, they all had their origin in his experience of being hated by a madman and of being pursued by an army seeking to kill him.  Hiding out in the wilderness of Judea, sleeping in caves, experiencing hunger and thirst on a daily basis, David had no hope except in God Himself -- the Good Shepherd.  He had a few men with him, who themselves were helpless against Saul's army.  And even when the opportunity arose to kill Saul, David could not bring himself to do harm to "God's anointed."

In the Psalms we find every human emotion, from despair to joy.  Even the feeling of wanting to destroy one's enemy and to "smash his children's head against the rocks."  (C.S. Lewis' Reflections on the Psalms is a great help for those who find such sentiments revolting.)  But my point here is that the Psalms encompass all of our human reactions.  They do not "worry" that such feelings are "unchristian" or unworthy; they acknowledge the spectrum of human experience, and because of that, we can find a home, so to speak, in their verses.  

It is always so encouraging to find someone who understands what we are going through, and who can give us some hope out of our despair.  I love to stumble across just the words I need in times of discouragement.  I wrote yesterday about discernment of spirits; what the Psalms do for me is give me peace.  Proverbs 25:11 says, A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.  When I find exactly what I need to hear, that's indeed like "apples of gold" to my spirit.

If we can find nothing else in Scripture to encourage us and to once again "set us upon a rock too high for (our) enemy to reach," (Ps. 18, paraphrased), the Psalms offer a wealth of supply for our need.  Back in 2010, on my way to the doctor only to find out I had lung cancer, I was listening to Charles Stanley talking about Ps. 57:1:  I will hide in the shadow of his wings until the disaster has passed me by.  Even before the diagnosis had been revealed, peace descended all over me and never left.

The Word of God is living and active and more powerful than any two-edged sword, ...discerning the thoughts and attitudes of the heart (Heb. 4:12). We need to put it to work for us!  Once the Psalms have applied balm to our wounds, the rest of scripture can begin to penetrate our hearts and minds also.

On Ignatian Spirituality and the Facebook Experience

 Recently I posted a quotation from Julian of Norwich* on Facebook:  

All shall be well,

 and all shall be Well,
and all manner of things shall be well.

Now Facebook is not my favorite thing, but every now and then I become ensnared by photos of animals doing hilarious, sweet, or ultra-cute things, and I continue to scroll through the pages watching for comments from friends and family.  In response to this particular quotation, a friend wrote that she especially loved the story of the cat that kept Julian company in her hermitage.  I had not heard that story but responded that I believed it.  And my friend wrote back that she believed all stories about cats.  

The result of this overall exchange was a chuckle and a brief re-connection with someone I had known professionally and warmly some years ago. Though now separated by time and distance, we were able to one again touch and smile as close friends based on our mutual love of both cats and spiritual response to the writings of a Catholic saint.

In my brief and infrequent forays into facebook, however, I have noticed a distinct division between this type of exchange and the raucous, angry, divisive type of commentary that goes on as par-for-the-course.  Many people have gotten off facebook altogether because of these exchanges.  In fact, just last night I heard someone comment that it is impossible even to have a conversation these days with those whose opinions differ.  Immediately, one is attacked as evil, as enemy, as stupid or uncaring, if one's question indicates a minority opinion from the majority.

Normally, I will not comment on the political forum; in fact, I flee from it altogether as I would if I found myself in the midst of an angry mob.  There is no sense in trying to have a discussion or conversation with those who are carrying bricks and bats and looking for something to destroy, any more than one would step into the street on the night of Kristallnacht* 1938 to discuss the actions of the Nazi troops.  The one time I questioned a comment on getting rid of the electoral college, I was attacked with a volume and a venom that immediately shut me down. 

In reflecting on these two fb experiences, the whole "story" of Ignatian discernment of spirits suddenly became real to me.  Ignatius was a Spanish Basque knight and soldier born in 1491, who loved stories of heroism and battle, of romance and chivalry. When he was severely wounded in battle and recovering in his family castle, he looked for books to read about adventure and great deeds.  All that was available to him, however, were the Bible and stories of the saints.  Eventually, Ignatius began to realize that when he read stories of heroism, he was left feeling unsettled and anxious -- I think I would characterize the feeling as "mildly disturbed."  When he read stories of the saints, or the life of Christ, he was left with a feeling of peace and calm that remained even when he was no longer reading.  

From his experience with noticing the effects certain kinds of reading had on his spirit, he developed The Ignatian Spiritual Exercises based on discernment of spirits.  In the past, when I have heard about "discernment of spirits," I thought of some esoteric "woo-woo" kind of thing, kind of way beyond me.  Now that I am actually listening to CDs based on the Ignatian spirituality, however, I realize that this is everyday experience to which we barely pay attention.

It took Ignatius paying attention to his own spiritual response to different kinds of experience to reveal that God has given to all of us a gift of discernment.  Certain things make us flee in fear; other experiences draw us with warmth, humor, and connection.  Certain experiences unite us; others repel us or disturb us.  When we begin to credit our own interior response to words and situations, we can be led into peace and joy and learn to avoid the things that disturb us.

What amazes me about facebook is that the people who are perpetually angry seem to be addicted to the anger and vituperation.  Day after day, they appear to be shaking their fists and asking others to join them in their outpouring of hatred and division.  Unfortunately, the prevailing mood does not stop at facebook, but has now taken to the public square in a movement much like Kristallnacht. 

*( I have asterisked both Julian of Norwich and Kristallnacht, intending to reference them at the end of this post, but actually, they are both so available on the internet with better explanations that I will leave them to the reader.) 

Learning to listen to our own spirits and believing that God wants unity and peace first within us and then among one another could be the secret to healing our nation and our souls.

God Shining Through

 Pope Francis recently gave a talk for the Feast of All Saints (November 1) in which he compared the saints to stained glass windows, which let the light shine through, each with its own particular hue.  When I think of the people I know, I can see the analogy:  some shine with brilliance/ intelligence; some with goodness and kindness; some with generosity and thoughtfulness; some with a great sense of humor that lightens every encounter.  When Jesus walked the earth, He embodied in every moment the goodness and image of Who God Is.  When He washed the feet of the apostles, He enfleshed -- made visible and concrete-- what God the Father has been doing for us since the beginning.  When He protected the woman caught in adultery, or called Matthew, or healed lepers, He was shining forth the Face of the Father.

A friend of mine had a stroke several years ago, which left her somewhat incapacitated.  Yet she is fully recovered enough to cook for 60 homeless people a day (someone delivers the food and picks it up, and she cooks in her own kitchen).  Once the owner of her own catering business in Atlanta, she probably has every right to feel sorry for herself, but now it's as if she were born to do this!  

We have just survived yet another hurricane, and when I walked out of my house Thursday morning, I was overwhelmed by what needed to be done and by our inability to tackle the task.  Spontaneously, I asked God to send someone to help us, preferably "someone with a chain saw."  Within a couple of hours, a neighbor in the next block whom we barely knew arrived --- with a chain saw and a tree saw.  "I want to help," he said, looking at the two trees that had partially come down in front of the house.  I didn't have the heart to show him the back yard.  "If you can just cut those trees down,' I told him, "I'll drag the pieces to the curb."  He worked for a couple of hours cutting one huge dead tree to the ground and sawing the pieces of another tree that had split down the middle.  

Later that morning, after  he had left, a young couple on bikes stopped to help me haul debris to the curb.  They cleared the ground of all the logs and branches that had been cut down and then offered to  help with whatever else we needed.  "Do you have a chain saw?" I asked, thinking of the wasteland in the back of the house.  He assured me he could borrow one, and I immediately hired them to come back the next day, which they did.  Their work was impeccable, as was their work ethic.  Never have I seen anyone tackle such a huge task with the energy and enthusiasm they had!  Not only did God answer MY prayer, but He answered theirs:  the young man had been in prison for 3 years at one time, and now finds it hard to get a job.  So now we have great help for everyday maintenance, and they have work.  (I have advertised their help to all my friends in the garden club, and now they have jobs lined up for awhile.)

In the past few days without power, neighbors have all worked together to ease the burden.  One of my neighbors arrived early the first day to offer space in her chest freezer for my frozen items; another brought us a small camp stove so that we could have hot coffee in the morning and hot soup at night -- what a huge difference that made!  Other neighbors brought us ice when it became available on the 3rd day, along with coffee from McDonald's, and told us not to worry about the broken fence between our homes -- they would repair it themselves.

In times like this, it is so easy to see "God shining through" each person in his/her own particular way.  What a joy it is!  Even a child can reflect the sweet love of God given to us in one another.  My favorite little boy (not quite 4 yet) met me after church Saturday with the biggest/ tightest hug I think I have ever received, and then he took my hand in his little hand and said, "I walk you to your car, Miss Gayle."  

Even in difficult times, God has a way of opening the clouds and letting His love shine through!

But you will receive power.....

But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; 
and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth. 

The very last words of Jesus to His disciples before He ascended into heaven were, "You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you...."

What is this "power" of which He spoke?  The Greek word here is dunamis: force, miraculous power, ability, abundance, might, miracle, power, strength, mighty (wonderful) work.  This Greek word is what underlies our English version: dynamite.  

The disciples had come to believe in Jesus, the Son of God, and in His "force, mighty power, wonderful work, strength," but had no clue in heaven or on earth that that same "force, mighty power, wonderful work, strength" would or could ever belong to them.  And yet, after the Day of Pentecost, when the Spirit of God descended on them in tongues of fire, we see the little band of ragged disciples doing the same things that Jesus did during His public ministry: healing the sick, casting out demons, drawing others through the word of God to the worship of the true God, etc. 

The church was alive with the power and the presence of Jesus Christ in His members, in the little band of believers -- the "little band" that grew by 3000 believers in one day!

When Paul arrived sometime later at Ephesus, he "found some disciples" and asked them, "Did you receive the Holy Spirit when (or after) you believed?"  They answered, "No, we have not even heard that there is a Holy Spirit."  As it turns out, they had not been baptized into Jesus Christ; they had received "John's baptism," a baptism (or ritual washing) of repentance.  John's baptism was intended to prepare them for the One Who Was to Come, Jesus Christ.  

What was it that caused Paul to ask the question: Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?  He must have noticed a lack of power among these believers.  An interesting phenomenon, I'd say.  A "lack of power"  -- isn't that what characterizes most of our churches today?  I am not talking about "hype" here --- the "good feeling" often generated by loud music, raised hands, and speaking in tongues; in "mighty miracles" accompanied by swooning and clapping.  I do not discredit any of these signs, as I have often participated in charismatic services in various churches.  And there are times when the church (and we ourselves) need to be awakened from slumber by a few outward demonstrations.  

However, the kind of "power" I am really looking for is the power evident in and flowing from the Person of Jesus Christ as revealed in the Gospels -- the power of Love, the power of Peace, the power of Kindness and Compassion, the Power of God moving among His people with gentleness --- gathering in the lost and the outcast, healing the lame, forgiving the sinner, overcoming our "human nature" inherited from the beginning and passed down from generation to generation.  The calling of Levi, the tax collecter, to be part of the Kingdom of God; the invitation  to Zacchaeus to come down out of the tree; the healing of Mary Magdalene, who was possessed by seven demons.   The drawing power of the Fatherhood of God inviting mankind to eat at His table, no matter their sins and offenses.  All can be forgiven; everything can be healed if only we ask --- that kind of power!

Do we belong to what Augustine called The City of God, or do we belong to the City of the World and its "power"?  Do we exhibit the nature of Adam, the "first man," or the nature of Christ, "the second man, the Man from heaven?" (1 Cor. 15).  

When the Holy Spirit "comes," He leads us in prayer (Romans 8), fills our minds with truth (Jn. 14 and 16), makes us holy (Gal. 5), and equips us to build up the church (Romans 12 and I Cor. 12 and 14).  That is the kind of dynamite that comes from heaven above, the kind of "power" that does not pass away when the music stops, the kind of power still flowing from Jesus Christ even to His last breath on the cross.  

Is this the kind of power we experience in our church today?

The Gift of Joy

 O God, I stand beaten and battered by the countless manifestations of my own inadequacies.  Yet, we must live with joy.... Aid me in this quest, O God.  Help me find satisfaction and a deep, abiding pleasure in all that I have, in all that I do, in all that I am.  ---Rabbi Nachman of Breslau

Rabbi Nachman of Breslau stressed the importance of joy in the spiritual life and encouraged his followers to spend an hour a day conversing with God, "as you would with your closest friend."  St. Dominic Savio once said, "Joy is the unmistakable sign of the presence of God."  I think the quest for joy is a universal one.  Most people would say the quest for happiness is the one that is universal, but joy, to me, goes deeper than happiness.  Happiness depends on circumstances; joy does not.    The night before He dies, Jesus tells the disciples, "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love....I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete" (John 15).

We thirst for this deep joy, but where can we find it?  Someone once told me, "You cannot give yourself joy!"  Why that should have been such a revelation to me, I cannot say, but it hit me between the eyes!  I had been trying to "manufacture" joy for some time -- transcendental meditation, no; positive thinking, no; yoga, no.  None of these worked for me; they gave me a modicum of peace for the moment, but life always intruded on that temporary "fix."  When someone prayed for me to receive the Holy Spirit, however, I discovered that I did not have to "do" joy -- it was a gift from Above!  

Psalm 16 is one of my favorites:

Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup;

You have made my lot secure.

The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;

surely I have a delightful inheritance.

I will praise the Lord, who counsels me;

even at night my heart instructs me.

I have set the Lord always before me.

Because he is at my right hand,

I will not be shaken.

Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;

my body also will rest secure,

because you will not abandon me to grave,

nor will you let your faithful one see decay.

You have made known to me the path of life;

you will fill me with joy in your presence,

with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

If we connect the words of  this Psalm with the words of Jesus at the Last Supper, we better understand His Gift of Joy to the disciples.  Joy is to be found in the Presence of God, and His Presence remains with us; it is up to us to tap into that Presence, as Rabbi Nachman advised -- talking to God daily as if He were our closest friend.  He doesn't always "answer" us, but He always bestows joy!

Mystical Experience and Everyday People

 Sometimes things come together in just the right way to make us catch our breath.  This morning was one of those moments.  I had just read an article by Father Ron Rolheiser, who has a way of always hitting the nail on the head.  The title of his article was "Mystical Experience and Everyday People."  In it, he said, Mysticism...normally has nothing to do with visions, altered states of consciousness, or states of ecstasy.  Rather it has to do with a searing clarity of mind and heart....Rarely are we ever in touch with our deepest center, without filters, purely; but when we are, that's what makes for a mystical experience."

Following Rolheiser's article, I picked up my morning meditation book, in which I read a reflection on a portion of the Rule of  St. Benedict:  Let us consider how we ought to behave in the presence of God and God's angels.  (Today is the feast of the Archangels Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael.)  The reflection begins with a quote from Minnesota poet Tom Hennen:

There are no creatures you cannot love.

 A frog calling at God
From the moon-filled ditch
As you stand on the country road in the June night.
The sound is enough to make the stars weep
With happiness.

 

And then the writer goes on to say:

 To sense each creature singing the hymn of its existence is to live joyfully in God's presence -- and in the presence of God's angels.  God's creation sings in the ordinary experiences of each day, each part of creation a voice in the chorus of worship of our Creator.  Every tree, every fish, every deer, every eagle is given a unique voice that harmonizes with that of the moon, the sun, the stars ---and with the angels and archangels and all the hosts and powers of heaven.  Let us sing the hymn of God's glory, as without end we acclaim, "Holy! Holy !Holy!"   (Father Michael Peterson, OSB)

Now that's what I'd call a mystical experience!   

Fresh From the Grave

 On the road to Emmaus, on the third day after the Crucifixion, two of the disciples meet a stranger.  What are you discussing together as you walk along? He asks.

They stand still, their faces downcast.  Are you the only one living in Jerusalem who doesn't know the things that have happened there in these days? And they relate to Him the events, including the report of the women who went to the tomb and did not find the body.

How slow of heart you are to believe all that the prophets have spoken! ...and beginning with Moses and all the Prophets, he explained to them what was said in all the Scriptures concerning Himself.

Were not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us? they later asked themselves after they had recognized Him in the breaking of the bread.

*********************************

Fresh from the grave, the only one He has met up to the moment has been Mary Magdalene.  Later that evening, He is to appear to His brothers, the Apostles.  But now, here are two "disciples," one of them by the name of Cleopas -- not mentioned in the Gospels up to now.  Let's, for the sake of argument here, call them ordinary "sinners," -- not because they are like Mary Magdalene or even like Peter.  Not because they have done anything wrong that we know of.  But only because they are like the rest of us, not yet transformed by grace. The Holy Spirit has not yet been poured out on all flesh, as He will be on the day of Pentecost fifty days from now.  As far as we know, they are good Jews; they had been hoping "that he was the one who was going to redeem Israel."

But "sinners" only because in their natural state, under the ministry of the "law," their minds were made "dull," according to 2 Cor. 3.  Paul writes:

Now if the ministry that ...was engraved in letters on stone came with glory, so that the Israelites could not look steadily at the face of Moses because of its glory, fading though it was, will not the ministry of the Spirit be even more glorious?....We are not like Moses, who would put a veil over his face to keep the Israelites from gazing at it while the radiance was fading away.  But their minds were made dull, for to this day the same veil remains when the old covenant is read.  It has not been removed, because only in Christ is it taken away.  Even to this day when Moses is read, a veil covers their hearts.  But whenever anyone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away...And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

The grave clothes are barely off the Christ; it is as if He cannot wait to begin the "ministry of the Spirit," which is to open the Scriptures to His disciples.  He wants us to understand all that Scriptures have spoken of Him.  He wants to open our minds so that our hearts are burning within us!  He wants to make our joy complete.  He wants to come close to us on the road, as we are discussing the events of the day!  At first, we don't recognize Him as he walks with us, but in further conversation, we begin to feel that something is different.  And slowly, like the dawn of creation, the Light begins to dawn in our hearts:

The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God...For God, who said, "Let light shine out of darkness," made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ (2 Cor. 3). 

It is only in the power of the Resurrection that Jesus was able to open minds and hearts.  Up to that moment, he could only speak in parables and in ordinary language.  He could teach and explain the parables to those who came to Him later, asking for an explanation.  But now, in the power of the Resurrection, He can enter behind closed doors, whether physically or spiritually.  And in the ordinary conversation on the road, He can begin to open the Scriptures to His disciples.  He cannot wait for Pentecost; to those close to Him, He must begin the ministry of glory.  He must begin to open their minds to understand all that He is, all that He has gone through.

What are you thinking about? He asks us.  And if we are willing to unfold to Him our thoughts, He is ready to enter into conversation with us.  And we must be aware of how we are feeling if we are to believe that He is indeed opening to us the meaning of all that has gone before. 

 

 

The Word Became Flesh -- Making It Real (Part 2)

 My ears had heard of you

but now my eyes have seen you (Job 42:5)

The words of Job when he encounters God (has an experience of the Divine) echo those of the Samaritan villagers in John 4: They said to the woman, "We no longer believe just because of what you said; now we have heard for ourselves, and we know that this man really is the Savior of the world."

"Hearing for ourselves," "Seeing for ourselves" is the rock upon which our faith is built.  John's prologue tells us that the Word became flesh and "pitched his tent among us."  It was not enough for God to send prophets with His message; He had to come in the flesh, so that we might experience in person His love, care, concern for us.  The Old and New Testament are a record of God's willingness to be involved in our lives. Jesus addresses people exactly the way the Father addressed people in the Old Testament -- invitingly, angrily, sadly, compassionately.  He calls people by name; he helps them in time of trouble, rescues them from oppression, forgives them, shows them a mother's love.  Jesus weeps for people, struggles to help them understand him, patiently tells them about the Father, warns them, urges them, takes them to task.

Early Christian literature shows that God continued to communicate with people even after Jesus' ascension.  Clement of Alexandria wrote an essay called Christ the Educator.  In it, he described Christian life in terms of the Word (Jesus) acting as the paidagogos (pedagogue) (companion educator) of the Christian.  In Greek culture, the pedagogue was a family servant who took the young child to school through the sometimes perilous city streets, stayed with him in the "classroom," and showed him how to learn through his example, advice, and the decisions he made in his environment.  His job was not academic --to teach the school subjects.  There was a schoolmaster for that.  The pedagogue, however, spent the day with the child, helping him learn through companionship.  The servant and the child formed a relationship of affection.

In Clement's mind, Christ does this for us; a continuous dialog takes place between Christ and the Christian, a dialog that occurs in shifting circumstances and continues through stages of development.  In our own day, the Spiritual Exercises of Ignatius of Loyola are based on the conviction that God can and wants to be met in dialog.  Ignatius had respect for the authority of the Church, but it did not substitute for the communication that God could address to an individual heart and the response that the person could make.

The Church is our schoolmaster; Christ is our Pedagogue.  He "opens our minds to understand the Scriptures;" He shows us their application in our own lives.  He is the rock upon which we ground our search for meaning. Like the Samaritan villagers, we cannot live by someone else's experience. We have to meet Christ "in the flesh" ourselves.  If we reflect on our own experience, we may find God's care and concern for us from the beginning.  Peter came to Andrew and said, "We have found the Messiah, the one written about in the Scriptures."  That "word" got Andrew's attention, but Andrew had to come for himself to "see" and "hear" Jesus in the flesh.  

The law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.  No one has ever seen God, but God the only Son, who is at the Father's side, has made him known (John 1:17).  

Jesus continues today to make the Father known to us, if we but know how to listen.

Making It Real

 John Henry Cardinal Newman is noted for taking the "notional" ideas of Christianity and making them real/ concrete/ particular.  It is what needs to happen in all of our lives.  Someone once said, "The man with an experience is never at the mercy of a man with an argument."  I think this is why the entire Old Testament is comprised not of rules and commandments, but rather of experiences, of "stories."  

But the stories we read must become our own if they are not to remain just history.  Which of us had not had the experience that Abraham had, of releasing (sacrificing) our children to the hands of God?  At some point, we have to let go of them and surrender them into His loving Providence and Care.  If we read the bible as just history or stories that happened back then, it will never be our story.

Usually, the Bible begins to come alive, to become "ours," when we encounter Jesus Christ.  He is the eternal Word of God, and only He can bring the written word to life for us.  On the Sunday of the Resurrection, the Risen Christ encounters two disciples as they leave Jerusalem in sadness and disappointment:  "We had hoped that He was the one who was going to redeem Israel."  But Jesus said to them, ...how slow of heart you are to believe all that the prophets have spoken. And beginning with Moses and all the Prophets, he explained to them what was said in all the Scriptures concerning himself.

My favorite Greek icon is the one portraying Jesus holding the open book in one hand, with the fingers of the other hand in the traditional pose of teacher.  The thing about icons is that they are meant to be "read," or interpreted, like literature.  Here, the meaning is clear:  only Jesus can open for us the book of life; only He can show us its reality and meaning.  St. Paul says somewhere, "the letter kills, but the spirit gives life."  Those who read slavery into the scriptures are good examples of what Paul is saying.  The bible without the Spirit can be read the way we want it to.  But Jesus promised at the Last Supper that He would send the Spirit who would reveal all things to us, taking from what is "Mine" and making it known to you (Jn. 14 and 16).

Today is the feast of the great St. Augustine.  In his autobiographical Confessions, Augustine reflects on the meaning of his life in light of its pivotal turning point -- his conversion and baptism.  In his reflections, he discerns the hand of God, caring for him and guiding him towards his eventual happiness.  Though he had long sought the meaning of life in philosophy, he ultimately recognized what the psalms call "the fair beauty of the Lord."  The words of Scripture suddenly became real for him; they were written about him!

It's not about religion; it's about relationship with the Living Word, who alone can show us its beauty.

Augustine wrote:  My soul is like a house, too small for you to enter, but I pray you to enlarge it.  It is in ruins, but I ask you to remake it.

If we remember that "soul" refers to our minds, hearts, and wills, his words become even more penetrating:  My mind is too small for you to enter, enlarge it.  My heart is in ruins, but I ask you to remake it.  My will is too weak to embrace You, but I beg you to strengthen me.

An Incredible Gift

 My mother almost died when I was born.  She was told that she had the Rh negative factor in her blood and that if she had any more children, she would die, or the child would die, or both would die.  At that time, Mom was not Catholic but Southern Baptist.  She saw nothing wrong with birth control, but my dad was not only Catholic but German Catholic.  A rule was a rule was a rule.  And my mother would do nothing to make him go against his faith.

When she became pregnant again, she told God, "If I die in childbirth, it's Your responsibility to raise these kids!"  Not only did she not die in childbirth, but she went on to have six healthy children.  She did lose one baby along the way, with much grief, and one of my sisters was a twin; the twin did not survive.

Today, I am so very grateful for my mother's faith; she did not know what to do but put the whole issue in the hands of God Himself.  And the result is an incredible gift -- all my wonderful brothers and sisters.  I cannot imagine what my life would have been without them; I cannot imagine my life today without them.

Man's wisdom is great indeed, but God's wisdom is greater, if only we can learn to tap into it. I think part of seeking wisdom is knowing that God wants to give it to us.  Numbers 24:16 says, "When he falls prostrate, his eyes are opened."  God communicates Himself to those who worship Him; He "inhabits the praise of His people (Ps. 22:3)."  C.S. Lewis says, In commanding us to praise Him, God is inviting us to enjoy Him (Reflections on the Psalms, Chapter 9).

Praise in natural to us in all things except God.  We naturally praise what we love and enjoy:  Isn't it a glorious sunset?  How beautiful are the mountains!  What a gorgeous baby!  What a sweet child!  All enjoyment spontaneously overflows into praise.  In fact, our praise seems to complete our enjoyment. But when it comes to praising God, we find ourselves constrained.  It somehow seems artificial to praise God, as if we are embarrassed, stilted.  We do not really "enjoy" God or find Him "beautiful and worthy of praise," even if we faithfully attend so-called "worship" services.  

I think the antidote to our natural reticence to praise God is reading the Psalms, which are full of praise.  Everything is commanded to praise God :  the sun and moon, the birds of the air, the trees of the forest -- commanded to "clap their hands, for He comes!"  Once we "get into" praise, it begins to feel a little less stilted to us and we begin to enjoy it -- and we discover that God Himself enters into our praise and begins to communicate with us in our praise. 

Someone once told me: "Praise is an emotional bandage over an emotional wound that prevents infection."  I have often experienced the fact that two emotions cannot inhabit the same space in us; once we begin to thank and praise God even in our hurt, we find the wound healing and joy taking its place.  Wisdom enlightens the heart, reaching into and over-riding the mind. 

My mother had the wisdom to submit her entire life to God's wisdom and care, even in the most difficult and impossible situation.  And the result is one no one could have predicted.  How grateful I am!

Jesus Wants to be Your Friend

I love watching The Journey Home on EWTN.  This program features men and women who somehow made "the journey" from atheism, agnosticism, Pentecostalism, Calvinism, Mormonism, or nothingnessism, etc. and who eventually found their way into Catholicism.  The reason I love this program is that I love watching how God works in people's lives, no matter where they are, where they begin.  I love hearing the story unfold of how they moved from wherever they begin; I love all the questions and struggles along the way; and I love the peace and joy they exhibit in telling the story.  Some of the guests were raised Catholic, left the church for a time, and eventually returned with a new set of eyes and new appreciation. 

Last night's guest was Kurt Hoover, a young man who was raised in the Wesleyan Church.  His journey of faith began when he was four years old and in Sunday school.  His teacher told the class that Jesus wanted to be their friend, and if they wanted Him as their friend, they had to tell Him so.  Even at four years of age, that made an impression on Kurt, so that night while his family was watching television, we went into a darkened hallway and there he told Jesus that he wanted Jesus to be his friend, and he asked Jesus to come into his heart. "And He Did!," Kurt exclaimed with a smile.  He didn't quite know how, but something was different from that day forward. 

Kurt's journey was, like so many others told on this program, a story of the Holy Spirit working in one life, gradually unfolding from point to point.  This was not the first time that I heard a story of the Holy Spirit working even in a little child, but what was so impressive about this story was that Kurt's mother died when he was ten, and he was left without a mother from that point on.  His father was very good, a very spiritual man, but he was struggling with his own grief and had to grow through it too.  Without knowing Jesus as his "friend," Kurt would have been totally alone.  His story can be found on chnetwork.org.

So many stories tell of God reaching out, leading, guiding, strengthening in hundreds of different ways.  He does not leave us alone, to our own devices.  He is forever wanting to be our Friend, if we will but ask. 

The Wise, The Foolish, The Evil

I am reading a book called Necessary Endings, by Dr. Henry Cloud.  Primarily written for business people, the book gives insights about when it is time to end a project, a relationship, or a business.  Most people, it seems, will hang onto endeavors that no longer work -- or that never worked -- in the hope that things will eventually get better.

In one of the chapters, Cloud writes that there are only 3 types of people: the wise, the foolish, and the evil.  The wise person is the one who, given the understanding that he has gone off course in some way, will correct his action or direction if given the opportunity, the resources, and the support or encouragement to do so.

The foolish person refuses to correct his/her behavior because it was never his/her fault; someone else is always to blame.  No amount of pointing out what happened; no amount of providing resources and opportunity; no amount of encouragement will persuade the foolish person to make a change.  He refuses to take responsibility, to apologize, or to change his course of action.

The evil person has no desire to change because he or she actually enjoys creating chaos or hurting others.  This person will sabotage whatever project is on the table, just for the pleasure of causing trouble or for being obstinate.

All three of these types may have the same past; they may have made the same mistakes and even caused the same pain to others.  But their futures are vastly different.  Cloud points out that you have to realize what type of person you are dealing with before deciding to end a relationship or business endeavor.   One of his telling markers is the question, "Do I still want to be having this same conversation two years from now?

We have just celebrated the feastday of St. Mary Magdalene.  According to the Gospel, Jesus cast 7 demons out of her.  We do not know if she was the same Mary, the sister of Martha and Lazarus, who sat at his feet listening to him, but we do know that she was one of the 3 Marys at the foot of the cross.  We know that she went to the tomb early Sunday morning to mourn the loss of Jesus, whom she loved beyond all telling.  We do know that she was the first to see the Risen Lord and to tell the Apostles that He was risen from the dead.

Mary was a wise woman, no matter what she lived in the past.  In her gratitude for being freed from 7 demons, she never left Jesus.  I find such comfort in her wisdom.  Jesus gave her the opportunity to be different; he provided the strength, the resources, and the encouragement she needed to change.  He cannot do less for any one of us.  The only question is whether we will recognize the provision He gives or continue in our foolishness because it's not really our fault, after all.

With Joy

With joy you will draw water from the well of salvation (Is. 12:3)

Before I had ever started reading the Bible, at a point of exhaustion and breakdown in my life, a counselor said to me, "Gayle, you cannot give yourself joy."  Now why this should have been such a revelation to me, I cannot tell you.  Looking back now, it seems to be a rather obvious conclusion.  And yet, I had spent a few years exploring ways to do just that!  I had looked into Transcendental Meditation, Yoga meditation, and The Power of Positive Thinking.  

Here's the problem:  With all of those methods, you actually have to DO them!  It reminds me of my mother complaining that when she bought her sewing machine, the salesman told her of all the wonderful things the machine could do.  "But it doesn't do any of those things," she said with a twinkle in her eye; "it just sits over there and does nothing!"  Yeah, I get it.  At the time I was looking for joy and inner peace, I had 3 small children who didn't get it -- no matter how tired I was, I was not going to nap during the day (or even at night most of the time.)  Nor was I going to sit down and ooom.  I remember how much I just wanted to read the Sunday paper with a cup of coffee!

Positive Thinking seemed to need a little reflection on my part, but the day I caught myself pouring a half-gallon of milk down the toilet when I had intended to put it in the refrigerator, I realized that I would be lucky just to get through the day sane; never mind "positive thinking."

Hearing the words, "You cannot give yourself joy" brought me up short!  Oh, really?   I looked up maybe for the first time in a long time, realizing the Source of Joy.  And I asked.   About six months after that, I received the Baptism of the Holy Spirit in the hospital, after being prayed over by my roommate, a 22-year old girl who had told me her own story of redemption.  Little did I realize at that time how effectively God had answered my prayer for joy!  

Now, some 43 years later, the joy that flooded my soul that day remains and has never left me!  I spontaneously started reading the Bible (another gift from the Holy Spirit), where I constantly find my joy renewed, and where I find references that strengthen me.  For example, Psalm 16 says:

My heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;

my body will also rest secure.....

You have made known to me the path of life;

you will fill me with joy in your presence,

with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

I think the first reference I stumbled upon, though, was Isaiah 12:3:  With joy, you will draw water from the well of salvation.  I remember reading about someone who drew a small flower next to verses she wanted to recall, and that was my very first "flower" in the bible I was then using.  Since then I have bought another bible, and I think that may be the only flower in the new one, although there are multiple underlines and notations now.  I was so thirsty for that water of joy that I actually jumped for joy when I read John 4 -- the woman at the well.  

What she needed most desperately was joy.  She, having had 5 husbands, went to the well a mile and half outside her town.  Presumably there was another well in the town visited by the respectable women who looked down on her.  She went at noon; presumably, they went early in the morning to fetch the necessary water for the day.  And she was alone there.  Jesus' words to her:  If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.....the water I give [you]  will become in [you] a spring of water welling up to eternal life.  

If we knew that the name of that living water was JOY, would we not want to drink from it every day?  But we cannot give it to ourselves; it is a Gift!

Ebenezer Road

If I ever wrote an autobiography, I'd have to call it Ebenezer Road.  (In fact, I wrote an account of my experience of Katrina in 2005, which I had planned to call Ebenezer Road were it ever published.)  In the Old Testament, as the Israelites made their way through the promised land after crossing the Red Sea, they periodically would build monuments made of stone, "...and they called it 'Ebenezer,' meaning 'thus far has God helped us'."  Those monuments remained throughout the land, and the next generations when seeing the monuments would ask, "What's the story here?"  Then the older generation would re-tell the miracles and glories they had witnessed on their journey--how God had been their Helper.

Toward the end of Jesus' earthly life, just before His arrest, He came into Jerusalem riding on a donkey, and "...the whole crowd of disciples began joyfully to praise God in loud voices for all the miracles they had seen.... Some of the Pharisees in the crowd [told Jesus to rebuke His disciples]. 'I tell you,' He replied, 'if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out'."  I wonder if the Jews at the time would have recognized the reference to their Ebenezer stones.

Literally, Ebenezer means "stone of help."  Karl Rahner is considered the greatest theologian of the 20th century.  He was once asked if he believed in miracles.  "I do not believe in miracles," he said; "I count on them to get me through the day."  Were I to begin piling up stones to commemorate the small and large miracles I have experienced, I'm sure I'd have at least a small fortress.  God's help is so subtle that most of the time we fail to recognize His hand in the matter, although a good bit of the time we do say, "Thank God!"

Last year, I was in California during the time of the wildfire in Sonoma.  As we watched the news, we began making preparations for the power to be shut off in our area not far away.  The gas tank had to be filled in case we needed to evacuate, the animals had to be thought of, and we needed food that didn't need refrigeration.  In the meantime, I texted a friend in Mississippi who worked in our parish, asking for prayer.  That Sunday morning, I rose early as usual and around sunrise, I noticed a wall of smoke advancing our way.  It slowly came toward the property and surrounded us for about an hour or two.  But then, it began to clear all around us for about a quarter of a mile.  I was surprised to see the smoke encircle the area where we were, remaining at a distance for the rest of the day.  I was able to go out and feed the horses, walk the dogs, etc. without any problem.  Amazingly, the smoke continued to hover around the property, but at some distance.  Even the sky above us was clear.

When I got back to Mississippi, I heard that my friend had alerted our pastor about the situation.  That morning at Mass, he announced that one of the parishioners was in California near the Sonoma fires, and he prayed that the angels would blow back the flames and keep us safe.  People will call that a coincidence, but I call it one of many miracles that have encompassed my life.  I don't think of these miracles as exceptional; I think of them as normal.  I am sure that if we could gather a group of survivors who were directly impacted by those fires, we would hear one story after another of miraculous intervention and escape. 

Psalm 54 says, Surely God is my help; the Lord is the one who sustains me. 

And Psalm 46: God is our refuge and our strength, an ever present help in distress.

And Isaiah 43:  When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
                          and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you.
                          When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned;
                           the flames will not set you ablaze.

Maybe I should start looking for some large stones!
            

What Does God Want?

I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you (Jn. 15:15). 

It's the darndest thing! (Or, as my next-door northern Mississippi neighbor would say, "Dang!")  We could not have guessed it on our own, although the Greeks probably came closest to it with their gods accompanying people on their journeys.  The Canaanites and other pagans often threw their infants into the fire as a sacrifice to appease their gods.  The Aztecs built temples wherein they cut and mutilated themselves at the top, or offered human sacrifice to their gods.  And the Pharisees scrutinized every practice to see whether Yahweh would or would not be pleased with the tithes and offerings of the hoi-poloi.

And then came Jesus, eating and drinking with sinners and tax-collectors, scandalizing everyone by healing on the Sabbeth, and asking whether it was lawful to do good on the Sabbeth, or to do evil.  (He asked the question because "Some of them there were looking for a reason to accuse Jesus....")

And then He said, "Make every effort to enter through the narrow door, because many, I tell you, will try to enter and will not be able to.  Once the owner of the house gets up and closes the door, you will stand outside knocking and pleading, 'Sir, open the door for us.'

"But he will answer, 'I don't know you or where you come from.'

"Then you will say, 'We ate and drank with you, and you taught in our streets.'

"But he will reply, 'I don't know you or where you come from. Away from me, all you evildoers!'"

So what is "the narrow door" of which He spoke?  What does God want from us?

Dang! He wants to be friends with us!  Who would have guessed it?  He wants to know us!  Matthew 7 has people coming to Jesus "on that day" saying, "....did we not prophesy in your name, and drive out many demons and perform many miracles?"  Then I will tell them plainly, "I never knew you."  He wants to be friends with us, wherever we are, wherever we are coming from!  He did say that we would do miracles in His Name, indeed, but it seems that it is not the miracles that cause us to enter the kingdom "on that day," but rather that He knows us!  And how, then, will He know us?

When I think about my good friends, whether I see them seldom or often, I think about an ease between us; I think about us easily walking in the same direction, not in opposition to one another.  I think about a free exchange of speech and a kind of undercurrent, or excitement, in being together.  I think about laughter and discovery, and maybe even free argument of ideas that does not wound but that ends in a shared glass of wine.  

God HAD to come in the flesh so that we could "walk with Him" and learn His innermost thoughts.  We have to somehow share the same Spirit with Him, as unlikely as it would seem.  When Jesus said to the Apostles, "I no longer call you servants, but friends," He said it at the Last Supper, at the same time He promised to send the Spirit to reveal what they could not then bear to hear. He would "take from what is mine and reveal it to you" (Jn. 16).  

We CAN be "friends" with God if we share one Spirit with Him, and Jesus promised to send the Spirit after He was raised from the dead.  The Acts of the Apostles is the story of that Spirit acting in the Apostles so that they continued to do what Jesus had done in the flesh.  2 Peter says :

His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.  Through these he has give us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.

What does God want?  He wants our friendship; He wants us to participate in His own Spirit.  As for everything else, He will provide whatever we need for "life and godliness."

Think on These Things

Finally, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable -- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy -- think about such things.....And the God of peace will be with you (Philippians 4:8).

Padre Pio once said, "I shudder to think of the harm done to numerous souls by the lack of spiritual reading."  And that was before the age of instantaneous information from sources beyond what he could have imagined.  Our children are bombarded today with information and images that shape their minds even before they have a chance at "spiritual" reading. Children's programming -- an apt term, by the way, since we now know how our brains are programmed by what is seen and heard---when I was growing up consisted of The Lone Ranger, Sky King, and Howdy Doody.  Today, even quality programming on tv is overshadowed by often violent video games and cell phone access.

Recently, our local paper carried an article titled, "Study links negative thinking to Alzheimer's disease."  Researchers have been observing patterns of thought they have labeled RNT, repeated negative thinking, in people over 55.  PET scans have measured two proteins -- tau and amyloid -- that cause Alzheimer's when they build up in the brain.  People with higher RNT patterns showed more cognitive decline over a four-year period, and they were more likely to have amyloid and tau deposits in their brains.  Depression and anxiety are also associated with cognitive decline, although the connections are still not clear.

Two days after that article appeared, the paper carried another one called, "Book of Delights author shares the truth about joy."  Ross Gay, a professor at Indiana University, spent one year writing every single day about something that delighted him -- hummingbirds, high-fives from strangers, and the laughing snort, which he calls "among the most emphatic evidences of delight."  His "Book of Delights: Catalog of Unabashed Gratitude" won the 2015 National Book Critics Circle Award.  His rules for writing were "Write quickly and by hand."  "When you notice you've been delighted, suddenly the world is more full of delights," he said.  Joy overflows from this man in the interview.

If we begin to observe our inner landscapes, we might notice what effect our "programming" has on us, for better or for worse.  Recently, I began watching a series I had heard people talking about -- The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.  It was light-hearted and funny, and I was enjoying my daily episodes.  However, about 9 episodes into the story, there was one so filled with the "f word" that it seemed to program my brain.  My mother once told me that the last thing you think about before going to bed is the first thing you will think about in the morning, and unfortunately, I had watched this episode just before retiring for the night.  As I tried to fall asleep, my head was filled with the "f" dialog, and I hated the feelings that filled my soul.  I finally promised myself never to do that again.  Instead, I try to make my last thoughts before sleep something worthy of waking up to.  I want to experience joy in the morning, not grief and abuse.  

Jesus said the kingdom of heaven is "the pearl of great price, for which a man will give all that he has."  Our inner kingdom of peace is worth preserving at all costs!

As in the Days of Noah......

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?....But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well (Matt. 6:27, 33).

In a time of Covid 19, it would seem that these words would assume paramount importance.  Our lives have changed.  No longer can we chase after "reaping and storing in barns," or "worrying about clothes," etc.  People cannot work; students cannot attend school.  What can we do?  Some look for ways to amuse themselves, but across the nation, we see millions of people turning to "seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness."

College students freed from their studies have organized ways to transport food from farms to cities, to feed those who are hungry and who cannot afford to buy food.  Small children have made bracelets to raise money to buy masks to protect lives.  Nurses and doctors have come out of retirement to help understaffed hospitals, working hour after hour to the point of exhaustion.

In the days after Katrina, I saw my entire world divided into light and dark:  there were those looting and shooting, taking advantage of the chaos that reigned in the city of New Orleans. And there were those who immediately went to work commandeering small boats and large trucks to rescue those abandoned on bridges, overpasses, and housetops.  When the world is turned upside down, there will always be Noahs who arrive with home-made Arks to rescue those who are drowning, and there will be those who are partying and laughing until the last moment before the flood washes over them.

Jesus said, "For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark; and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away.  That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. Two men will be in the field; one will be taken and the other left....Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom the master has put in charge of the servants in his household to give them their food at the proper time?"

A time like this of chaos and confusion tends to divide the whole world into two camps --- those who will add to the darkness and those who will bring whatever light (righteousness) they can to the situation.  

Fear and Faith

It was a warm summer's afternoon in the 1980's.  We were living in Metairie, about 4 miles from our church, and I was getting ready to attend the Saturday vigil Mass at 5:00 pm.  For some odd reason, I had forgotten that my husband was attending a conference downtown, and since we had only one car, I had no transportation to church.  I walked out the front door about 20 minutes to 5 and stood in mild shock staring at the empty driveway.  I briefly thought about starting to walk to church, but then realized the impossibility of making 4 miles in 20 minutes.  Suddenly, I heard a voice in my spirit: Fear turns back; Faith goes forward.

Laughing at my own foolishness, I decided to take a chance.  The worst that could happen would be that I would go a mile and turn back, having taken a much-needed walk.  The best that could happen would be that I would get a ride to church and learn something about faith.  My biggest problem was that we lived alongside a canal, and in order to cut off about half a mile's distance, I would have to walk in the weeds along the canal for a short distance in my good clothes and shoes. 

Rapidly trudging alongside the canal, I tried not to think about how stupid this whole idea was.  Actually, though, I had an inner sense of adventure and excitement.  I was, in a sense, "testing God" to see if the voice in my head was real or only my imagination.  After leaving the weeds, I walked alongside the main road for about half a mile when I spotted some good friends at an intersection.   They were waiting for traffic to clear when they saw me waving from across the street.  Crossing over to go in my direction, they stopped to pick me up, asking whether I was going to church too.

When they heard my story, they could not believe it.  They had been leaving for church when their mother realized she had forgotten something and so had been delayed for a few minutes while she went back into the house to retrieve it.  Thus, they "happened" to be at the intersection at the same time I arrived there.  What a great lesson it was for both of us:  Fear turns back; faith goes forward!

Mulling over the whole situation later, I realized that if I had gotten ready for church knowing that I had no car and not enough time to walk, it might have been presumption on my part to think God would provide a way, when I could have just waited until Sunday morning to attend Mass.  But my decision to walk was based solely on the direction of the moment, which I though might have been coming from the Holy Spirit.  I wanted to test that voice, which seemed so strong and so sure.  It was hard for me to believe that I was making it up on the spur of the moment.  And how glad I was that I decided to try it out!  I was learning to believe that God would guide me in more difficult moments of my life. 

It seems to me that this was what the journey of Abraham might have been all about.  First, a Voice inviting him to take a chance to "Come and see."  Then, Abraham being intrigued and wondering what might happen if he ventured forth.  Could this Voice be trusted?  And finding out along the way that he was not left alone after all.  Little by little discovering in small and then in larger ways that he was being held up and accompanied on the way.

The Danish philosopher Soren Kierkegaard wrote: We cannot stop doubt with reasons. Those who try have not learned that it is wasted effort.....if someone wanted to be [Jesus's] follower, he said to that person something like this: "Venture a decisive act; then you can begin, then you will know."  What does this mean? It means that no one becomes a believer by hearing about Christianity, by reading about it, by thinking about it....No, a certain setting is required---venture a decisive act. The proof does not precede but follows; it exists in and with the life that follows Christ.   (Kierkegaard, Provocations)

Stability and Strength

In the first book of Kings, we read that when Solomon was building the Temple in Jerusalem, he had two bronze pillars erected at the entrance.  The pillar on the right was named Jachin, which means "stability."  On the left, the pillar was called Boaz, which means "power." (I Kings 7:21). 

A twelfth-century monk named Aelred of Rievaulx pointed out that Jesus also erected two "pillars" at the entrance of His church: Peter (stability) and Paul (power or strength).  Thus, the church of Jesus Christ is built on a firm foundation, not shaken at its core.  In fact, when the charismatic movement was at its strongest in the 70's and 80's, my pastor in Kenner preached a remarkable sermon wherein he said that we need the church at Rome (stability) as well as the church at Ephesus (power, charisma).  Without both pillars, the church faces the situation of becoming either stale in its stability or unhinged in its power.  And indeed, any armchair historian has seen the church go through both phases before eventually being corrected by the power of the Holy Spirit operating in His saints.

In thinking about the beauty of the church balancing itself over the years through the stability of Peter and the charisma of Paul, it occurred to me that Peter was not always "stable" nor Paul "charismatic."  It took the traumatic "shaking" of both men at the core of their personalities and the filling of the Holy Spirit to make them into the "pillars of the church" that we recognize today.  Peter's denial of Christ must have been a shock to the very center of his being after he had just told the Lord (Jn. 13) that he would lay down his life for Him.  And Paul, so sure in the center of his heart that the followers of the The Way were heretical Jews betraying the faith of Abraham, had to be knocked to the ground by his encounter with the risen Lord.

Indeed, as Pope Francis recently pointed out in his general audience of June 10, God wants to change all of us as He changed Jacob when he wrestled with the Lord to obtain a blessing and a "new name -- Israel."  "This is a beautiful invitation," the Pope said, "to let ourselves be changed by God....we are only poor men and women, [but] God has a blessing reserved for those who have let themselves be changed by Him."

The change God wants to make in us, it seems to me, is to make us into Temples of His Living Presence like the Temple in Jerusalem and like the church first established at Rome and in Ephesus.  In order to do that, He must build into us "stability and strength/power."  For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, says Paul to Timothy (2 Tim. I:7), but a spirit of power, of love, and of a sound mind (or self-discipline).

You shall receive power -- the Greek word used here in the Acts of the Apostles is our root word for dynamite---when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, Jesus tells the apostles, and if you obey My words, you shall be like a house built on a firm foundation (rock)....when the wind and rains come, you shall not fail (Matt. 7).

Stability, Power, and Strength -- these are the Pillars of the Church, and these are the pillars that God wants to build into our personalities as temples of the Living God.  Pope Francis tells us that God wants to change us as He did Jacob, and wants to give us a "new name" -- no longer cheater, grabber, usurper, but (Jacob) rather, One who has prevailed with God and with men, (Israel).